Getting settled

This is my apartment- the kitchen/bathroom/front door are there on the right, and the floor space expands in an approximately 2 Elliots x 1.25 Elliots square space to the foreground.

See that tiny little loft up there on the right? That's where I live. About 2 Elliots deep, .67 Elliots wide, and .5 Elliots tall. (Since the Japanese would actually measure this space in tatami mats, I see no reason why my own arbitrary distance doesn't hold equal merit).

My roommate is 中山絢太 (Kenta Nakayama). He seems like a pretty cool guy, although we haven't yet spent a lot of time together. He's really busy with a part-time job and some other things that I'm not really sure about. I'm not entirely convinced that working in a noodle shop requires you to leave for your job at midnight and come back the next morning at 9:30, so I'm going to assume that he has ties to the Yakuza.

Incidentally, Kenta is wearing my fratty glasses in this photo--Thanks Margeaux! Apparently all the Japanese OGU partners thought they were the coolest thing in the world, and there's an extensive series of photos of everyone trying them in turn and looking badass.

First thing I did upon getting home today: make rice, and make tea. I think I'm officially an Asian housewife. But I'm getting better at feeding myself myself in Japan- at first it was a challenge to cook for myself when I was shopping for unfamiliar ingredients with directions I could only read 60% percent. The first dinner didn't happen because I tried to take a brief nap at 4 in the afternoon only to wake up at 4 am the next morning (oops), and then the next one was basically rice and noodles because I didn't have anything fresh or interesting to add to the carb fest. Realizing how quickly I would get tired of that, I made something much nicer tonight...

Isn't that the cutest little Donburi bowl you've ever seen? I pre-gamed dinner with some takoyaki (fried squid balls), then made a bowl of rice with fish and seaweed sprinkles, some beef and onions in a savory sauce, fresh tomatoes, mugi tea, and followed it up later with Dango, a sweet rice flour dumpling. Please note that the cup says in Japanese "Let's go out to find happiness!" It's matching partner says "I want to fly to wherever you are". The spoon has a smiley face. Totally bringing these home.

This is from the open air mall space where we had a banquet for all the students and Japanese partners- the whole area was covered in posters of this cat character doing different things, sometimes recreating classic movies? My favorite is the Star Wars pose. I have no idea what significance the series of cats hold.

I tested into the top level- exactly what I wanted, although I was terrified it wouldn't happen and I'd be stuck in a level that didn't challenge me like last summer in HIF. It's actually the largest of the classes, meaning there are 5 of us (but I guess that's what happens in a program of 14). We practiced speed reading today- something I hadn't really expected I would have been able to do in Japanese.

So far class is pretty manageable. I've been surprised that I feel like my weakness right is speaking. Like, at all. Out of nowhere I've become able to understand most of what's happening on the TV, comprehend all of the lengthy directions and discussions from 三森先生 (Mimori Sensei), and read an enormous volume of complex kanji while figuring out compound words I've never seen from familiar kanji. And despite all that, I'm stumbling over trying to express anything longer than a direct sentence. Balls.

Unrelated to anything else: it's weird how many American stars I've seen on Japanese TV. Ke$ha was at the red carpet entrance to some sort of Japanese music awards night, and she described her costume in the characteristic Ke$ha drawl ("It's like a... sexy bird.") while the subtitles translated ("セックシ・バード。”). Then I saw the cast of Sex and the City 2 interviewed by a Japanese station, and the main lady (Carrie?) talked at length about how you should sleep enough if you want to be pretty. And then the interviewer girl said how little she slept, and it was awkward for everyone.

I'm in Japan. Yeah.

I arrived in Tokyo what seemed like a couple hours ahead of schedule, and much to my chagrin, the Hot Dog wrapped in an American flag and rubbing himself with condiments was not there to greet me this time. Originally I wasn't supposed to be in till five, but I had cleared customs (I improved my track record by not getting quarantined) retrieved my bags, planned the train route, and boarded the Limited Super Express by 4:45.

I realize it probably could have been easier to fly straight to Osaka, since I found tickets from JFK to Osaka for only about $80 more than to Tokyo. Might've been faster and cost less than the $160ish train tickets. Make a note for next year's travel instructions, Kelly?

These trains and airports, though, are where I take pride in being the only American traveling by himself. I see other people in family or social groups, most often sightseeing and without much language background. But my rarity again sticks out: even when I'm asking (in Japanese) which ticket to put through the turnstile (sometimes its two, sometimes its three, sometimes the machine returns a different number than what you put in) I most often get the response back in English. I walked up and down the 自由席 cars of the train looking for an open spot to sit, realizing of course I was the only non-Asian. Yes, I'm pretty tall, and yes I'm blonde. We've been there before, can we get over that already?

I had toyed with the idea of dying my hair darker before this trip to Japan, just to shortcut the numerous interactions of “OMG LOOK AT THAT TALL BLONDE FOREIGN DUDE” but decided against it. A) It would take a lot more than that to make me look inconspicuous, and B) For this one case, at least, Japan is going to have to adjust itself to my differences, and not the other way around. So suck it.

The first sign that told I had truly returned to Japan: HEATED TOILET SEATS. We are so uncivilized in the states.

But, I did avert the major crises of traveling. After remembering how much I screwed up losing my baggage on the train last time, I ran back just in time to my unattended crew duffel. And then swapping trains at Tokyo's Shinagawa station, I didn't realize that bullet trains only stopped for about 10 seconds before moving on. I barely made it on as I walked along the outside to my designated car then panicked when the gut-wrenching train sounds started happening all around me.

On the train though, I managed to strike up my first conversation with a real live Nihonjin since arriving, a cute girl about my age. She had been dozing and apologized if she had slept with her head on my shoulder; I was so full of the jet-lag madness that I hadn't noticed if she had. We were both kinda tired and my brain wasn't (isn't) yet functional so the conversation didn't get much past simple “where you from” “where you going” type questions, but as she departed at 名古屋 she smiled, leaned in close, and said to me “思い出たくさん作ってください”. ("Please make a lot of memories") D'awww. Maybe a cheesy way to start the trip, but I like it.

"But wait!" I hear you saying. "You haven't even included a single nonsensical picture! And linking to one from last time doesn't count!" Well then. I give you Wicked, on its Japan-wide tour.

You can't even tell the actress playing Elphaba is Asian. Because she's GREEN!

Start of Osaka 2010: a new summer, a new city

Light Fellowship: Take Two. This is the beginning of posts for the summer of 2010, going to Osaka. Everything before this was Summer 2009, doing a light fellowship in Hakodate.


This time I'm headed to Osaka. Barely recovered from spring semester and deadweek and graduation and the rollercoaster of emotions that entails, and I'm flying straight from New Haven to Japan.

Only issue: the program CET didn't really give me enough arrival details to get a flight that would arrive early enough. They told me just to get a flight arriving on the 28th, so that's what I got. 1:10 pm out of JFK, 5 pm (the next day) in Tokyo. Three hours of bullet trains from there to Osaka. Best case scenario I arrive by 10 pm, most likely much later. This is of course past the time when CET is doing all the orientation and providing me a means of getting into the apartment in which I'll be living. Won't yet have a phone so won't be able to contact my roommate either.

So... unknown city late at night + jet lag + carrying luggage + not knowing my address + no one to meet me there = adventure... right? Bring it on.

Will write more interesting things and add pictures as I'm in Japan. I really got a kick out of blogging last summer, and (maybe it's just me being a total narcissist) but when I had something good to write about I think I managed to convey some pretty cool experiences and insights.

終了じゃない。

This is my last night in Japan before I board a plane out of Narita tomorrow. Still a lot to digest about this country, but as I wandered outside my Capsule hotel in Asakusa, Tokyo tonight I got the best going away present I could have asked for. A gaijin asked if I lived here and could give him directions. Maybe it was because I had just dropped off all my luggage so I no longer had the telltale signs of a traveler myself, but in that moment I felt so at ease in this city that I very easily could have passed as an expatriate.

My relationship with Tokyo, for having been here a sum total of three days, is already very different from Hakodate. In a small, silly way, I own Tokyo in a way that I never owned the city where I spent two months during HIF. While I certainly know the sights of Hakodate better, Tokyo is free and open to me. With the self-taught subway skills, I can go anywhere. There are no expectations for me to be anywhere or to fit into somebody else's system- I'll make my own choices and my own mistakes, and I'll deal with the consequences. (This is not to downplay the huge amounts of help I got from Nick- he was exceedingly generous in letting me crash at his place, show me around a bit, and travel with me to 盛岡 in 岩手県 and 田沢湖. But I've still had a lot of time on my own, and a lot of things I've accomplished on my own.)

I'm suddenly able to apply Japanese in new ways- for the first time, I can imply meanings and readings of unfamiliar compounds with my expanding knowledge of kanji. I can play through a text heavy RPG on DS (ドラゴン・クエスト　IX: 星空の守り日と） by reading most of it, looking up what I can and figuring out the rest. I bought a book intended for adults WITH NO PICTURES in it. It could hardly be called a novel by real writing standards, but still, I can read it, and that's a milestone.

Both in Hakodate and Tokyo, I see swarms of お盆 tourists and resent them- I am no longer one of them. Japan is not a week-long joyride of museums and resorts, Japan is years of struggle and pain and misunderstanding and un-acceptance before you should be allowed to have fun with it. They belittle all I've worked for, by furthering the widely-held idea that foreigners have no capacity to master any part of this language or culture.

In certain ways, I already found parts of Tokyo not known to either the gaijin or the natives. I love the Asakusa street markets piled in a maze around Osenji shrine during the day, and its one of the few overwhelmingly touristy areas I can really enjoy. But at night, its transformed; the stalls close and the hoards go to neon-clad shops on other streets. But here in front of Osenji is still brightly lit from all sides, only now the shrines stand free of the sea of bodies, merely the sound of cicadas and one straggler shaking out his lucky stick from the みくじ jar breaking the reverie.




But in the end, the best thing I've come up with to describe my relationship with Japan: Hate sex. There's some aspect of love intermingled oh-so-messily with a frustration, or a resentment,
that manifests itself in vehement urges, not of violence but of wanting so badly to be good at this language that the only thing I can do is thrust myself angrily into it. And I feel like I can't slow down. I want to be ぺらぺら to spite all the natives who believe the blonde American is incapable. I need to earn that respect, (and not the ubiquitous and insincere 上手ですね) by dominating the language, and speaking it severely.

Tomorrow, to Tsukiji to look at fish, to Narita to board a plane, to Spokane to finally catch my breath.

さようなら!

Grammar Lessons with Elliot

I went to a club in the hilariously sketchy 西新宿二町目 district, where before long I was danced all up ons by a Brazilian. I was really hoping for a Nihonjin, but because this particular Brazilian lived in Japan and spoke Japanese fluently that was really my main criterion.

After dancing, I was told the following: ”やりたい”。

This statement included neither a subject nor an object of the verb, as Japanese speech is wont to do. But as I've gradually gotten better at understanding these sorts of things and filling in the blanks, I was pretty sure what was meant, but decided to clarify all the same.

"僕を？”

Yes, that is exactly what was meant. I discovered that night that not only has my speech progressed to the point where I can flirt in Japanese, I can also politely decline (adamantly refuse) night club intercourse. Hooray!

旅行しています

I'm in Morioka! After the insanity of the speech contest / IS presentations / final exams / goodbye party and the like, I hit the road. First a few days in Nick's apartment in Tokyo, then to Morioka until the 13th. Then I'll be back to Tokyo for a night in a capsule hotel before I hop a plane home on the 14th.

In short, the past couple of days have been too silly/improbable to be real. Speedy bare summary-
SATURDAY
~Arrive in Tokyo: steal a key to Nick's apartment while he finished his final presentation elsewhere
~Adventure to Asakusa, buy some sweet omiyage for family, and a jinbe coat for myself
~Meet a small hoarde of Yalies on the subway. (Seriously?)
~Meet up with Nick, adventure out to Nishi-Shinjuku-Nichoume, a marvelously sketchy place. Hahaha. Buy sketchy omiyage for Kelvin.
SUNDAY
~Go to Ikebukuro. Objectify cats at the cat cafe.
~Go to Akihabara. Objectify women at the maid cafe.
~Fan-made manga, used electronics stores, cheapest and/or most questionable anime I've ever purchased
MONDAY
~Help Sun Academy kids move out of their apartments, go out for western styled pizza. (I miss New Haven!)
~Almost leave behind my bag on the subway. Say whew, that was close, let's not do that again.
~Actually leave behind my bag as we board the bullet train. EPIC FAIL.

So I'll be roughing it a few days... we got the station to find my bag and hold it till I'm back in Tokyo (free storage! WOOOOO). I probably would have been able to manage on my own eventually, with lots of miscommunication and frustration, but it was very nice to have the language competency and moral support of Nick on my side. Until then, I have my wallet, my passport, my dictionary, my DS, my compy, and a lot of anime. I lucked out in that I have everything essential with me, but nothing comfortable (IE CLOTHES). The cable connecting my camera and PC is with the lost bag, so you get none of the pretty pictures of Tokyo. BOOO.

Really looking forward to coming home, but a few days of chill, clothes-less travel time will be a good way to debrief. The summer had its positive points but also its share of challenges and frustrations- going over these with my infinitely wiser suitemate who faced many of the same things will be helpful.

憧れ

So things are starting to wind down. All the projects and presentations are finished, and the final's tomorrow. Earlier this week I was fearing I'd leave with a lot of pent-up frustration, towards the country and the program and the language, but I think I got over at least part of the negative hump tonight.

Sometimes, I rant about the impression Japan is like an after school clubhouse--they have their special bottle-cap badges and the secret knock at the door and the "no girls allowed" sign on the door. Now make it a little more grown-up (but only a little) and replace "girls" with "gaijin". So of course, gaijin Elliot is not invited to the weekly meetings. But even so, there's moments of incredibly compelling kindness that wipe away all the negatives.

Today I went to the Judo dojo for the last time, to say my goodbyes to Suda-san and the sensei and the other judo-ka. I had already parted ways with my rental gi, and was surprised to see everyone else in their officer uniforms, not yet changed for practice. I had never conceptualized of most of them in anything but the white robe. We sat outside the dojo as they smoked, making small talk. Somebody had requested me to come (Suda-san? Mae-san? The polite suggestion of Okada-sensei who found me the class in the first place? When I was told my presence had been requested, the Japanese tendency to avoid attributing facts to a subject left this part out) but I didn't know what was expected of me.

It was a quiet goodbye, without events or speeches, just being, a time of enjoying the moment without much need for words. A goodbye is hard, something I barely know how to do in English. But I had a moment of realizing I was just sitting there amid these powerful, grown men, and I was accepted into the club.

My clumsy foreigner's tongue stumbled over the words for kindness and simple expressions of thanks I've used any number of times. I wonder if they understood the sincerity of what I tried to convey. I feel like one of my finest accomplishments of the summer is continuing to go to Judo; every time I started the hour-long commute by myself I could feel the deep knot of fear in my stomach. I went day after day, first to a dojo that had little interest in accepting me before I found the new one (that certainly brought its own uncertainties for being part of a prison facility). I knew I would be thrown to the mat effortlessly by the blackbelts, and acquire a new collection of bruises / blisters / inexplicable bleeding bits, and struggle to hang onto the sensei's every word in a desperate attempt to understand the physical moves that are both art and war. With the kindness of private tutorial before class and constantly imparted advice, I finally found a connection between the effort put in and the results I gained. Though I still couldn't dream of beating the real blackbelts, I learned increasingly difficult throws (or sometimes, how to deal with being thrown in an increasingly difficult fashion). That took a phenomenal burst of courage everyday.

If I found a class at home, will it mean the same thing in an environment of comfort? Hmm.

And now to to do a complete mood 180, please enjoy the video of me performing Hakodate's いか踊 (SQUID DANCE!!) at sunday's festival, 港祭り。(video credits: Julia Leonard) Please note that my arms are unreasonably long.


函館名物いか踊
いかさし、しおから、いかそめん
もう一つおまけにいかぽぽ
いかいかいかいかいか踊

Hakodate’s famous product - squid dance
squid sashimi salted squid guts squid noodles
one more dish - ika popo
squid squid squid squid squid dance!!!!